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Trucula
Diamond Member
Joined: 20 Feb 2004
Posts: 1135
Location: Rte. 522
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 Posted: Thursday Mar 01, 2007 |
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The Tax Man!
At the end of the tax year the Tax Office sent an inspector to audit the books of a Synagogue. While he was checking the books he turned to the Rabbi and said, "I notice you buy a lot of candles. What do you do with the candle drippings?"
Good question, noted the Rabbi. "We save them up and send them back to the candle makers, and every now and then they send us a free box of candles."
"Oh," replied the auditor, somewhat disappointed that his unusual question
had a practical answer. But on he went, in his obnoxious way: What about
all these bread wafer purchases? What do you do with the crumbs?"
Ah, yes," replied the Rabbi, realizing that the inspector was trying to
trap him with an unanswerable question. We collect them and send them back to the manufactures, and every now and then they send us a free box of bread wafers."
"I see," replied the auditor, thinking hard about how he could fluster the know-it-all Rabbi. "Well, Rabbi," he went on, "what do you do with all leftover foreskins from the circumcisions you perform?"
"Here, too, we do not waste," answered the Rabbi. "What we do is save all the foreskins and send them to the Tax office, and once a year they send us a complete dick." 
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byndrsn
Platinum Member
Joined: 01 Jun 2003
Posts: 848
Location: Cambria County
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| Posted: Thursday Mar 01, 2007 |
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Good One!!!
Here is another Tax joke that I got an email on yesterday:
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2007 Tax Code
The only thing that the IRS has not taxed yet is the male penis.
This is due to the fact that 69% of the time it is hanging around unemployed, 10% of the time it is hard up 20% of the time it is pissed off and 1% of the time it is in the hole. On top of that, it has two dependents and they are both nuts!
HOWEVER, effective January 1st, 2007, the penis will now be taxed according to size. (Thanks to our new speaker of the house Nancy Pelosi) The brackets are as follows:
10 - 12" Luxury Tax $300.00
8 - 10" Pole Tax $250.00
5 - 8" Privilege Tax $150.00
3 - 5" Nuisance Tax $30.00
Males exceeding 12" must file capital gains.
Anyone fewer than 4 inches is eligible for a tax refund.
PLEASE DO NOT ASK FOR AN EXTENSION
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A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man; a debt he proposes to pay off with your money. -G Gordon Liddy |
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