Politics explained for dumb people ....

DirtySanchez · Post by **DirtySanchez** » Mon Jan 12, 2009 5:49 pm

MOONDOGGY wrote:Trendy Eco-friendly Green-freak government: You have 2 cows. You must organically raise more cows and harvest their high-methane concentrate flatulence. Use this organic methane gas to heat and power the farms. Use the cow's organic urine to make organic fuel to power the organic tractors. Use the cow's fur to insulate the barns. Save the planet. It can't fend for itself.

Buy The cow a Faux fur coat, cuz it's naked now, and share a vegan cupcake with it.

songsmith · Post by **songsmith** » Mon Jan 12, 2009 7:27 pm

Cokehead: You have two cows. Let'stradethemformoreblowIlike cokedoyoulikecokeIlikecoke.

Pothead: You have two cows. We should get them high and drink the milk, then we can get high just by drinking milk, maaaaan. (Then you both watch TV and forget about it.)

Shroomhead: You have two cows, both of which are plaid and sing in languages you can't speak, but somehow understand.

Acid Freak: You have two cows. They say, "Ooooooom," and the colors are amazing.

Methfreak: You have two cows, and you look like shit.

Alcoholic: You have two cows, and I f*cking love you, man.

Ecstacy Raver: You have two cows, and you love f*cking men.

Heroin Junkie: Your grandma HAD two cows. Now she won't talk to you anymore.

Viagra user: You have two cows. They both look at you suspiciously, and keep their distance. After 4 hours, they call a doctor.

Cialis user: You have two cows. They're bathing in the two bathtubs you happen to keep in your backyard. (What's up with that?)

---------------------->JMS

metalchurch · Post by **metalchurch** » Mon Jan 12, 2009 7:30 pm

Good stuff Johnny!

slackin@dabass · Post by **slackin@dabass** » Mon Jan 12, 2009 8:23 pm

bassist_25 wrote:
slackin@dabass wrote:
sorry, but i must point out that it is politically incorrect to call them cows anymore. the preferred phrase is "beast of bovine origin"

Now that's some funny shizzle right there.

not as funny as :

songsmith wrote:Cokehead: You have two cows. Let'stradethemformoreblowIlike cokedoyoulikecokeIlikecoke.

Pothead: You have two cows. We should get them high and drink the milk, then we can get high just by drinking milk, maaaaan. (Then you both watch TV and forget about it.)

Shroomhead: You have two cows, both of which are plaid and sing in languages you can't speak, but somehow understand.

Acid Freak: You have two cows. They say, "Ooooooom," and the colors are amazing.

Methfreak: You have two cows, and you look like shit.

Alcoholic: You have two cows, and I f*cking love you, man.

Ecstacy Raver: You have two cows, and you love f*cking men.

Heroin Junkie: Your grandma HAD two cows. Now she won't talk to you anymore.

Viagra user: You have two cows. They both look at you suspiciously, and keep their distance. After 4 hours, they call a doctor.

Cialis user: You have two cows. They're bathing in the two bathtubs you happen to keep in your backyard. (What's up with that?)
Shocked ---------------------->JMS

RobTheDrummer · Post by **RobTheDrummer** » Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:34 pm

Don't forget that shrooms grow on cow shit!

f.sciarrillo · Post by **f.sciarrillo** » Mon Jan 12, 2009 11:37 pm

I am laughing so hard I have tears in my eyes. This is some good stuff here lol !

whitedevilone · Post by **whitedevilone** » Tue Jan 13, 2009 11:12 am

Cows are best cooked.

Yes i probably keep to many tabs on people i dislike: i.e. Al Franken

Songsmith:I love you

f.sciarrillo · Post by **f.sciarrillo** » Tue Jan 13, 2009 10:56 pm

whitedevilone wrote:
Songsmith:I love you

Awwwwwww - Group hug

I can't stand Franken either ..