"We don't play that."

[ToonaRockGuy]

Dammit Rob, you always used to blame that stuff on me when I played with you guys for the summer!!!!

Rob: "I'm not sure if the drummer knows it, he's new to the group. Let me check."

[BDR]

I bet you hate this one too...Hey Rob, play an original tune!
Wow! This sarcasm stuff is fun!

(See, I even cover other people's Photoshop humor ...)

r:>)

[Jacklyn Miauff]

HMM.......My husband's band never seems to have these problems. They just simply state that they don't play that song and apologize. The people sometimes stay around a little to chat, but this never seems to be an issue. I would say that you need to stay kind and personable with them.
I am sure there are times that you can't please everybody and they may get upset. If they become an annoying idiot and won't leave you alone.........then it is the bouncers and bartenders' job to properly dispose of the annoyance if it is getting to be that big of a deal. Most of the time...........if you just ignore the problem it goes away instead of adding to the fire with more immature comments.

[HurricaneBob]

I bet you hate this one too...Hey Rob, play an original tune!
Wow! This sarcasm stuff is fun!

(See, I even cover other people's Photoshop humor ...)

r:>)

Now thats original...Not!

[Jacklyn Miauff]

Bob! Nice picture of you sweetie

[bassist_25]

Unfortunatley, I don't have the time to post the EPIC friggin NOVEL I could rant about this particular subject. But for us we get several basic types:

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS SARCASM, ELEMENTS OF PARODY AND FACETIUOS COMMENTS, READ CAREFULLY

Idiot Type 1: (Cluelessius Moronicus, Major) This type listens to half a set of B.B. King and Stevie Ray Tunes, sees several women dancing and most of the audience getting into it and decides that our setlist isn't complete with out GodSmak or Pantera

We generally ignore this one cause 9 times out of ten he, and it's almost always a he, was wasted at 8pm when we began setting up.

Type 2 (Cluelessius Moronicus, Minor) This one gets it that we're not gonna play Godsmak or Pantera but insists on hearing some other tune or group that we just don't do like BTO or the AC/DC or the Doors

This one is only slightly more sober that Type 1 so we give him what he wants, sort of...We play Backdoor man (a Howling Wolf tune that the doors also covered) or the dreaded Roadhouse blues (BTW, just because you put the word "blues" in a song title doesn't make it blues) This is also why we started playing The Jack. We also began doing our Sweet little Werewolves medley to quiet down this one.

Type 3 (Knowitallasaurus Geekius) This annoying creature tries to bust the bands balls by asking for a song that while probably is within the genre but requires special equipment (like the London Symphony Orchestra or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir)to play properly, or is so obscure that only the most cloistered of musical monks has even heard of it.

This Type doesn't want to hear the tune as much as he wants to demonstrate his UberGeek prowess to the band, we usually let him rattle on for a few minutes and offer him another song by that artist or some other rarely heard chesnut, if possible while complying with another request from Type 2 or Type 4.

Type 4 is my favorite (Slutus Intoxicus) Baby Girl just wants to dance to music she knows. For some reason (an odd reaction to alcohol that should be studied by medical science, I suspect) her ability to count to four is connected to the part of brain that remembers lyrics so unless she's heard the song a billion times it is not danceable to her.

but since the only music she's ever heard comes from the paltry list of tired old wedding songs permitted on Altoona Airwaves she's probably not too familiar with anyone's set list, Buy her a drink and play something familiar, for us that's ZZ Top or George Thorogood and it usually does the trick, if you're lucky She''ll blow ya, later.

Theese are not the only annoying little monsters inhabiting our world but they are among the most annoying, I hope this little primer has been helpful.

ROTFLMAO!!!

It's funny because it's true. I generally dislike requests. It's not so much that I hate honoring requests, but some people are real obnoxious about it. I swear that people take it personally if you don't know a song that they want to hear. We play songs in lot of different tunings and I always hate it when it comes time for old sKool to switch guitars in the middle of a set because that gives people an opportunitity to start barking out requests. I hate it when people try to talk to me while I'm either playing or between songs. Do you walk up to a guy running a band saw at the saw mill and try to strike up a conversation with him? We're all pretty approachable, so I wish that people would wait until we got off for break when they ask for a song.

I also hate the one guy 9(Cluelessius Moronicus, Major as Vinny pointed out) that comes up and asks for the Hatebreed or the Cannibal Corprse tune. I hate trying to have to explain to him that while he may be interested in hearing a song by one of those groups, chances are 99% of the people on the dance floor don't, and by playing that song, those 99% are no longer going to be on the dance floor.

Wow, bitching feels good.

[tonefight]

Just ask them "Do you go to a Chinese restaurant and order speghetti? "
When they give you that puzzled look tell 'em to go think about it.

[Banned]

Lonewolf,
Now after reading these posts, I kinda feel like Moron/idiot no. 1 for always asking you to do those Wishbone Ash covers. by the way, speaking of ash, could i see those "assh" tray pics of yours again?

[bassist4life2004]

Man , that's a good one about saying you played the song... I'd try that, but I bet they'd make you play it again. I've played Margaritaville as many as 4 times in one day (different gigs).---->JMS

The whole beauty of it is walking up to them after the show and saying that. Dont say it even when you have 4:35 left of the show, because, 3:22 seconds of that will be used to play their favorite skynard or megadeth song.

[RobTheDrummer]

Just ask them "Do you go to a Chinese restaurant and order speghetti? "
When they give you that puzzled look tell 'em to go think about it.

Hey, I did that once. The lady says to me, "You want Itaran, you go Orive Goden."

[lonewolf]

Lonewolf,
Now after reading these posts, I kinda feel like Moron/idiot no. 1 for always asking you to do those Wishbone Ash covers. by the way, speaking of ash, could i see those "assh" tray pics of yours again?

That's OK, I do the same thing to Flame Sky. Keep those Wishbone Ash requests coming, it gives me a good excuse to play it.

I think the assh tray pic is Bobby's.

[songsmith]

I just don't get why people get angry about not doing their song. Do people really have that much of a need to control you? I say that because I really have a need not to be controlled. I actually like the acoustic jobs where I stay in the background, where nobody feels comfortable talking with me until I'm finished, because they let me do my thing... I get to use my judgement and experience to play what "fits" and generally I get compliments on the show, instead of a particular song.
Anyway, why get PISSED if some cat doesn't play exactly what you want when you want it? You're setting yourself up for frustration.----->JMS

[bassist4life2004]

when im at a bar listening to another band, and i want to hear a song, its always a song that i know is in their genre. I wouldnt ask Felix and the Hurricanes to play Slayer or Pantera, and shit like that. Im not stupid, like some other people are. Im in an acoustic band, and yea, we play some weird shit acoustically like Tool, Godsmack, Nickelback, and some other metal/rock. But i feel like pounding the one person in the bar that yells "Play some slayer, SLAYER, SLAAAAAYER" like we cant fuckin hear them. We are acoustic, we can hear basically everything that everyone says, we arent dumb or def, we just dont listen to people that act like r-tards. When we get requests for metallica, we normally play nothing else matters, or something like that, hell, we even do enter sandman sometimes, but people want to hear One, and Master Of Puppets, like we can fuckin accomplish anything we want to on acoustic guitars.

----End Of Rant----

[songsmith]

Here's on I tried once or twice:
"Sure, I'll play 'Whiplash" if you can do the audience sound from 'I Want You To Want Me' from Cheap Trick At Budokan."
Upfront... it doesn't work. -------->JMS

[YankeeRose]

And this sarcasm you all speak of, is it like an orgasm? I like those.--->JMS

Yes songsmith, when properly practiced, sarcasm is sort of like an orgasm, as when you are done laughing so much you feel spent afterwards...if it's really good, there might even be tears!

[DMFJ03]

An old Beyond Reason trick...we'll see if we can't learn it on break (usually we can), or we'll try to throw it in before we leave.

[J Michaels]

When some whining piece of drunken ass comes up to me and says "Can you play _____", I just throw out my lats, lower my aivators down my nose and glare at her and say, "Can you suck a golf ball through a garden hose?" Usually she says something lame like "Asshole" and walks away, but sometimes they catch a glimpse of my 35" pythons and they say "I'd sure like to try". SO I take them backstage and.....


Ugh.. Huh? What the.....? Oh, man - I think woofburger was telepathically channelling an answer through me! Oh god - he has superpowers.... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

[ThrashKillsYou]

I always get SLAYER!!!!!!! Good thing I know a couple Slayer songs. other than that no one has ever approached me (or any other band member that I know of) asking to play a certain song.

[Trucula]

Alot of people ask for a song because a word in a song or a riff reminds them of something else ...or they just heard it on the radio before they came in....or the band the night before played it..and your not gonna please everybody!.. Sometimes if the guy is drunk enough you can say "Yeah, thats comming up in the next set"....by then most will forget, or they leave by then.

[YankeeRose]

When some whining piece of drunken ass comes up to me and says "Can you play _____", I just throw out my lats, lower my aivators down my nose and glare at her and say, "Can you suck a golf ball through a garden hose?" Usually she says something lame like "Asshole" and walks away, but sometimes they catch a glimpse of my 35" pythons and they say "I'd sure like to try". SO I take them backstage and.....

You mean you actually carry around a Golf Ball and a Garden Hose? That's just plain SICK!

[Griff]

I keep it simple most of the time I say wow cool tune , sorry we dont do that, I wish we did but we cant do them all.

[no surrender]

Okay, so last week I was at The Post doing the sit-down lazy-ass steel guitar thing with the Blind Jonny boys... some clown asks if they do any Clapton. Red says, "No, but that's good stuff," which is word-for-word what I've been telling people who ask for songs I don't play. It's quick, makes them happy you like their taste in music, and when they walk away, you can mutter under your breath.
When people like what we do, and make requests of like-minded songs, hey, nothing wrong with that... but when they ask our classic-rock band for Neil McCoy's "The Shake," or Megadeth, then get genuinely pissed if you don't play it, what can you do?

So.... how do you nicely tell people you don't/won't/can't play their song?---------------------------------------------------->JMS

Ya BUT can yer play yer GEETBOX with a BOW?????



"lucy you got sum practicin to do!" rickyy riccardo
hahahahhahahahhha!

GALLOW'S POOL!!!!!!

HANGMAN HANGMAN HOLD IT A LITTLE WHILE!!!
Think I see my friends coming
Riding a many mile.
Friends did you get some silver?
Did you get a little gold?
What did you bring me my dear friends
To keep me from the Gallows Pole?
What did you bring me to keep me from the Gallows Pole?
I couldn't get no silver I couldn't get no gold
You know that we're too damn poor
To keep you from the Gallows Pole.
Hangman, hangman, hold it a little while,
I think I see my brother coming,
Riding a many mile.
Brother, did you get me some silver?
Did you get a little gold?
What did you bring me, my brother,
To keep me from the Gallows Pole?
Brother, I brought you some silver,
I brought a little gold,
I brought a little of ev'ry thing
To keep you from the Gallows Pole.
Yes, I brought you to keep you from the Gallows Pole.
Hangman, hangman, turn your head awhile,
I think I see my sister coming,
Riding a many mile, mile, mile.
Sister, I implore you, take him by the hand,
Take him to some shady bower,
Save me from the wrath of this man,
Please take him,
Save me from the wrath of this man, man.
Hangman, hangman, upon your face a smile,
Pray tell me that I'm free to ride,
Ride for many mile, mile, mile.
Oh, yes, you got a fine sister,
She warmed my blood from cold,
Brought my blood to boiling hot
To keep you from the Gallows Pole,
Your brother brought me silver,
Your sister warmed my soul,
But now I laugh and pull so hard
And see you swinging on the Gallows Pole
Keep-a-swingin'!
SWINGIN' ON GALLOW'S POOL!!!! \\

[Seanson]

After playing in a classic rock/blues band for five years and playing in a modern rock band for just over a year I've been asked to play everything from ZZ Top to "Dancin' Queen" by ABBA. Sometimes people are nice about it when you say you don't know their request and sometimes they get nasty with you. When they get nasty with me about it I usually say something smartass like, "You really wanna hear Bob Segar's 'Fire Down Below'?" and when they say "Yeah!" real excited, I say, "Put a dollar in the jukebox then, facist." But seriously, look at it this way.... when I go out to see a band, I want to hear their original stuff.... whether it's their own spin on a good cover or an original. If I went out to see Bob Segar in concert and he played Skynyrd all night, I'd be pissed, ya know.

[no surrender]

it's really interesting to hear you guys call your "bread and butter" (audience) clowns and loosers etc.. really gives me a new perspective ... since i go to your shows (did!)

another way to handle this is ... LEARN SOME NEW SHIT!!! why can't you play these requests?????? wtf is the problem.. can't handle it! haha! now who's laughing...


ps when the band says to ME "oh we don't so that sorry".. i think to myself 'what a bunch loosers" ironic isn't it

psps LED ZEP RULES!!!!
at least, learn some led zep!! please!

[Seanson]

I never called anyone a loser... I just agree that it gets annoying when you play out, someone requests something, you don't know it and they get pissed. Chances are, if you name it, I can learn it but thats besides the point. My opinion is that a band plays what it wants to play and if thats not good enough for someone, they can spend their $4 cover on that candy bar they've been eyeing up. However, once again, I never called anyone a loser.